Monday, February 27, 2006
never the sinner.
really interesting play. it really makes you think about a lot of issues. it was basically about these two gays nathan and dick who killed and mutilated a 15-year-old kid bobbie franks. the play was basically about the murder and the trial, and it sought to explore the personal/psychological side of the two guys i suppose. morbidly disturbing. anw there was some discussion about justice and vengeance, and i really like what the defence lawyer said: "i can hate the sin all i want, but never the sinner." really really nice.
anw before the play i was sort of stuck in school (i didn't wanna go all the way home just to come all the way back again), and was trying to do physics extra questions. which was really bad cuz after 1 hr + i still couldn't get part 1(a). totally gave up after that (just fyi, i still haven't done it yet) and went to eat dinner. met zi zhong there, who said i was loner and should go and get a girl or something -_-. heh. was feeling quite inspired so i wrote a couple of poems (well i wrote three actually but i think the third one is kinda sketchy and needs some work) after eating and on the way to clark quay on the train.
SolitudeThere's nothing wrong with solitude,
No problem with being alone.
While some may crave another's presence,
All I need is my own.
There's no harm in solitude,
A time to find some peace.
A chance to gain some inner calm,
And smooth a worried crease.
Though others seem to tug at me
With emotions true and strong,
I can't let go enough, and so
They slowly pass along.
For there's no harm in solitude
And no wrong in being alone.
While I may need another's presence,
Well, all I have is my own.
the poem seems kinda disjointed, and i suppose it does need work. but well. it was written in a rather depressive (well maybe that's just too strong a word) state, so yeah. anw here's the other one:
My HeartMy heart
must be invisible
(or myself
too opaque),
for everyone
i wish to give it to
never seems to see it.
seems rather angsty eh. well whatever larh haha. i guess i'm just going through a really moodswing-ish time now (well it seems like i've been going through this phase for like forever but yeah.)
stained with coffee at 12:37 AM
Monday, February 20, 2006
YIN WEI GO HOME.
i have no idea what the ppl in today's episode are doing. seriously. only the last guy can really sing properly. everyone else just has awful pitching and stupid song-choice. well the last guy had an odd kinda choice as well but at least he can sing. oh well. i think national talent shows are kinda sad.
xue hao is a jinx. whenever he makes a suggestion about where to go and i follow him, something bad happens to me. like last last thursday, when we went orchard and my wallet and phone got stolen (well my wallet turned up at lakeside mrt a few days later, sans my money and ezlink card), and again today, when we went to secret recipe and i broke the stupid cup thing that they use to hold sugar and creamer. haha k larh. i suppose i shouldn't blame him, i'm just commiting post hoc. but yeah. it feels better to blame someone else for my carelessness :P (well the wallet incident was really stupid cuz it got stolen in the span of like. less than 1/2 a min). anw i have learnt my lesson: never follow xue hao's suggetions! C: heh no larh. its just that i have to be more careful from now on. heh.
hmm. what else should i blog about. the no poker cards rule has been sort of semi-implemented again, which is kinda sad. cuz now our bridge-crazy class has nothing much to do during breaks and after school. of course it means that more time can be spent on more constructive things such as tutorials and other homework assignments lolx. i bet that was what the school was aiming for anyway. or maybe they just don't want the canteen to be so crowded after school (for what reason i have no idea)... after all, with this no cards before 5 rule everyone seems to go home and the canteen is just much more empty after like. 3.
okay that's all for now.
just a note for all catholics attending jc out there, there will be a jc mass on the 24th at the SJI chapel at 630pm... all jc students are welcome to attend, so please do turn up. it'll be great.
stained with coffee at 8:59 PM
Thursday, February 02, 2006
disillusioned.
seems like every aspect of my life is just going down the drain now. getting home drained everyday, can't seem to do whatever i like properly anymore. i get more frustration than enjoyment on the tennis courts nowadays, there's always a sense of failure in me after choir practices, i can't seem to play any pieces right at the piano. feels so easy just to give up and say "i quit, i can't do this" but what wil i miss out on if i don't keep going? but sometimes it really seems so pointless.
InvictusOut of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance,
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears,
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.
William Ernest Henleywell i don't suppose my situation is really THAT drastic, but yeah. maybe i'll just push a little more.
stained with coffee at 7:44 PM
